ANONYMOUS COMMENTER CELEBRATES THE LIFE OF CAPTAIN BOB

Just because he's nuts or eccentric (same thing, one has money) doesn't mean that Captain Bob is an idiot or retarded or stupid. 

He's the proverbial hare who is so far ahead of Brownsville pack o' turtles that the fleet o' foot (a star quarterback according to legend), driven by boredom and maybe a parasite lodged deep inside his brain, finally stops pretending he gives a shit and tells the local rat race to fuck off and he goes relaxing by the shade of a tree to hang out with Veronica Lake and smoke some locoweed and watch the clouds roll by. 

What-a-bourgeois! 

Though his fortunes have waned due to a slacking off on the ambition thing, he's still a rich guy by Brownsville standards. 

While most of us are still driven by illusions of power, pussy or money, or even a free meal, Captain Bob is indifferent... been there, fucked that. 

He has evolved from petty materialistic to spiritually materialistic, a 4-20 slacker who likes Trump. Figure that one out. 

So big deal the captain doesn't want to get sweaty on a Saturday morning picking up trash. Like Trump, he'll send a driver to collect the shit and take it to the dump. 

Unlike D/PM, Capt. Bob won't stiff the driver.

Without seeking too much praise, he gives away more free meals than HEB at Thanksgiving. 

I don't think it's fair to criticize The Krazy Kaptain for donating money instead of sweat. I wouldn't be surprised if one day he tells trash-picking volunteers to stop by for a free meal at Captain Bob's. 

Either way, it's a lot more than most parasitic bloggers do, with the exception of Barton who did the CASA thing for awhile and the respected x-lawyer B/WC, the pro-boner Jesuit who's a walking telenovela. 

In his eyes, Montoya and McHale, once trusted allies, are on his shitlist because they won't write down his midnight confessions when he tells all the world about you know who. 

As everyone in the village knows by now, Captain Bob is obsessed with dongtime legislator Rene "Mister Goodbar" Oliveira for screwing his life and, depending on the lunar tides, hates most bloggers except for Da Pet Monkey who is showing the captain how to navigate the internet reefs without getting sued once again. 

I enjoy reading goofy Captain Bob because he's untethered and alive. 

Like Baudelaire and Picasso, Capt. Bob sees life through the eyes of a child, showing awe and appreciation for fishtail palms, white pelicans and the cool autumn winds that blew by recently.